Family Life

my child could not hear


When I committed myself to be a stay-at-home mum, for the most part anyway, I always thought my daughter would thrive and flourish. I was spending time with her, devoting myself to her, teaching her, and, talking to her always. Yes, I thought my child would be the one who spoke first.

And we gave her excuses, we gave ourselves excuses

‘You were a lazy talker’, my mum said.

‘She knows she doesn’t have to talk because she gets everything she wants from you’, said my mother-in law.

‘She will get there in her own time‘, said another.

‘Wait till she starts day-care, then she will start talking’, another friend said.

And as a parent, you never want to admit that there may be something more serious. Or that there may be something wrong.

And for months, I did as everyone suggested. Not push her. And I waited for day care to start. And then it started. And then she turned two. And her language and speech was still not good.

And then, just like that I decided that I had to follow my intuition. My gut feeling.

And I did. And I got her hearing tested.

“Her ears are FULL of fluid. Of course she can’t hear properly”.

A sigh of relief. But fear and guilt at the same time. Because why did I not do this earlier? Why did I not follow my intuition earlier. My little girl had such a hearing impairment that she was hearing muffled sounds for the majority of her life. ‘Like being underwater’, the audiologist explained to me. And here I was, not doing anything about it. Not believing in myself, not my daughter’s capabilities.

And all I can think of is what would have happened if I didn’t listen to anyone else; if I did just follow my own feelings. Where would she be today? What would her language be like today?

And we saw a specialist. And she had a procedure done to drain the fluid. And she now has grommets in her ears. And her speech has improved 300% and more. And I am so proud of her. And she is talking and talking and talking and I just want to scream with joy.

And I realise how important it is to follow your own feeling, your own beliefs, your own intuition. Because when mothers feel that there is something not quite right, there generally is something not quite right. And it isn’t mothers being paranoid, or overprotective, or anxious, it is a mothers intuition.

And that is real !

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  • Maxabella

    That’s what Oprah might call a ‘lightbulb moment’ but what I would call a ‘listening to your inner voice’ moment. We always know what’s what, really but we find it hard to hear for different reasons.

    You are such a clever mumma and have made a world of difference for her, Tahlia. x

  • ELISA {With Grace & Eve}

    Agreed – mother’s intuition is real, beautiful and amazing! Glad you followed yours. I keep reminding myself to check in with mine xx

  • Bree @ Twinkle in the Eye

    You are so right about listening to your ‘gut’, right every time :-)

  • numala kinder

    I had a similar experience with my son. Turns out he required a hearing aid but we didn’t click on this need until he was four and a half. Four and a half years of struggling with language and communication. It’s been a bumpy road for him academically but he’s been well supported. The hearing aid also wiped out those mega tantrums that made no sense. It was a mixed experience: relief came with his hearing aid but guilt at not picking it up for years.