A weekend with me, myself and I

A few weeks ago I spent two nights away from my family. On my own. No children, no husband, no friends. Just me. Because, you see, I realised that I was not being the best person, mother and wife I could be. It was at that emotional point of feeling totally run down, totally exhausted, and partly non-human. My candle was burning to the end.

And as much as I have always given myself permission to take time out for myself, this was different. Having a gym session, going for a run, going for lunch with friends somehow did not equate to a two-night personal individual getaway to myself. But as hard as the decision was, it was exactly what this mumma needed.

As I drove myself to my little getaway lodge, I had the music pumping with my favourite tracks, instead of my daily Insy Winsy Spider and Where Is Thumbkin driving music. Yes, I got to listen to my music for a whole solid two hour drive. And even though it was my husband’s car which I hate driving, I didn’t care, it didn’t matter. This drive was pure bliss.

And for a whole two nights and two days, I did nothing but have me time. Time to myself to read a book, lie on the beach, read some more of my book and catch up on about a year’s worth of exhaustion and interrupted sleep. All while my husbie is taking caring of my munchkins.

When you start to feel like every day is the same day, the same moments, and little things are missed and not appreciated, it is a moment to realise that something needs to change. And that was the moment I realised I needed to change something. A getaway to myself allowed me to go to another place, another world, and an opportunity to think only of me. Because this parenting gig is tough work. Very tough.

And he got to miss me, and i got to miss him. He got to appreciate, really appreciate what the daily antics of two young kids involve. What they involve with only one pair of hands, not two like on the weekends. And the munchkins got to miss me. And I got to miss them on a whole new level. Because I often don’t get that opportunity. I don’t get the big ‘dadda home’ welcome like dadda gets when he gets home each day.

So, I got to experience all of that, and more. Much more.

And it was exactly what this little family needed. And the truth is, this Mumma now feels more human, more alive and able to not miss those little moments.

They are not missed at all.